Carolyn in South Africa

Our bags were packed and we were ready to go!! My friend Judith and I were about to leave my house for a week’s vacation in St. Lucia. The only thing I had left to do was to drop off my keys at the house next door so that another woman on the farm could get in to feed my cat while I was gone.

I live on a farm that has 4 houses on it and the entire property is gated with an electrified fence. I have a “beeper” to open and close the gate which I keep on my key ring along with my other keys.

I handed my maps and magnifying glass to Judith and headed for the farmhouse to drop off my keys. Judith started the rental car and started for the gate. It then occurred to me that I would need someone to shut the gate behind us because I was leaving my keys. I went into the farmhouse and found that no one was home. Two of their dogs got out in the process.

So now we had a dilemma: we could not leave and not close the gate again. Not to worry I said “I will check the gate on another part of the farm and if it is open it will lead us to a second wooden gate that isn’t alarmed and we can get out that way.” But first I had to get the 2 dogs back into the farmhouse. That done, I set off for the second gate. Fortunately it was open and I headed for the outside world.

Halfway to the back gate, I realize that I do not have my purse. So I turned around, went back through the gate and headed back to my house. I went into my house and found my purse and raincoat, by the way, still lying on my bed. I picked them up, locked up my house and headed to the gates a second time.

I got to about the same distance and I realized that I still had forgotten my water bottle! Around I go, back to my house to get my water bottle. By now my cat is really wondering: What is going on??? That done, I lock up my house again and head for the gates a third time.

I had almost reached the last gate when I realized that I still had my keys in my hand!! By this time, Judith is wondering what has happened to me! Back I go to the farmhouse and drop off my keys and exasperated with myself I again head for the gates.

This time I actually make it! I climbed through the wooden gate and found Judith waiting with the rental car. As I approach her, she tells me that she can’t find the maps and magnifying glass that I had handed to her before setting off to drop off my keys. Ironic, huh?

This time I could only laugh!! But this time I sent HER back through the gates to retrace her steps and I sat in the rental car. She did find them, on the ground next to where the rental car had been parked at my house. Back in the car, we left the farm with the hope that between us we still had one functioning brain!!!

The only other thing I wanted to do before leaving town was to check my post office box. It wasn’t until I was actually standing in front of my P.O. Box that it dawned on me that my key was back at the farmhouse with my other keys!!

It was a full 3 days later when Judith asked me: “Why didn’t you just take the house keys off of your key ring to leave and take the “beeper” and other keys with you?

You know, it never ever, ever occurred to me.

I have written about our twice-yearly psycho-social support camps for orphans and vulnerable children before. Children in distress usually begin opening up to our Youth Leaders on the third day. We have a referral system in place so that they can arrange to have me assess a child/youth who needs it. Many of these children have such sad stories and there is such a shortage of Social Workers here in South Africa that I often feel discouraged.

During our last camps in July, I assessed 9 primary school children and 15 secondary youth. Many of them had multiple needs: food, money, clothes, guardianship, removal from their current living situation, foster placement, etc. We can do some things here at camp in that they eat well and we provide them with clothes that have been given to us by volunteers. At every camp, we have had a least one child with no place to go after camp. We have been able to temporarily house these children but it takes a long time before their situation is properly managed by a Social Worker.

I was asked to see a 17-year old girl whose mother had died 3 years earlier and who never knew her father (this is a common scenario here). Children/Youth are not the best of historians so it is often difficult to get an accurate accounting of what has happened to them. Thuli (not her real name) told me that she went to live with her Mamkhulu (her mother’s older sister) after her mother died. She told me that she was not allowed to stay in school and had to do chores all the time.

When I asked about her current living situation, she told me that she lived in a 2-room house with 8 other children and her Mamkhulu. She said that her Mamkhulu believes that she has told someone in the community that she is a “witch” (a very bad thing here). She tells me her Mamkhulu treats her badly; making her and her younger sister sleep outside at night often. It is COLD here in July and this is clearly a not-ok thing to do.

Thuli told me that she was now attending school and participating in the KIDS CLUB that 2 of our Youth Leaders run at the school. She said that when a community member learned that she was not attending school, he talked to a teacher and they talked to the Mamkhulu and Thuli was re-enrolled in school. But she is afraid she may not be able to stay in school next year because Mamkhulu said that she will not pay her school fees.

Thuli also told me that Social Services had been involved with her situation in the past and that she and her sister were removed from Mamkhulu’s care and placed with a foster mom. But after a week, she told me, a distant Uncle came to the foster home with a gun and demanded that the children leave with him. He took them back to the Mamkhulu’s house. I referred this young girl to Social Services in the rural community where she was staying while she was still at camp.

Camps end on a Sunday. Monday morning, my Supervisor got a telephone call from Ntokozo, one of our Youth Leaders. Thuli had returned home from camp and the Mamkhulu would not let her in the house. She had to spend the night outdoors and “went to sleep with no food” (also a common occurrence). In the morning she went to the Youth Leader’s house (she lives in the same community) and asked her for help.

My Supervisor, Heather, and I got into her car and went to the Youth Leader’s home and picked them both up. We had also brought our Lead Youth Leader, Sam, with us. We drove to Nelspruit and went to the Social Services department and found the Social Worker in charge, fortunately, Heather knew her. We told her the whole story and said that this child had no place to live and what could they do to help her?

I had a contact telephone number for Mamkhulu and gave it to them. It just so happened that the Social Worker that is responsible for Thuli’s community was in the building that morning. She came in to assist and tried to reach the Mamkhulu by phone. It was explained to us that this is where they would have to start, to “hear her side of the story” because often children “don’t tell us the truth.”

We waited – something else we do quite a bit of here. When the Social Worker came back we learned the following. The telephone number was an “Aunt’s” who turned out to be a younger sister of Thuli’s mother. Thuli and her younger sister came to live with her and her husband after their mother passed away. The Mamkhulu thought that the children might be getting some money from their mother’s estate and demanded that they stay with her. Aunt said no. Mamkhulu said the children cannot stay with her because the man she is married to is not the children’s biological father, so the Aunt relented. There wasn’t any money for the children in their mother’s meager estate and she believed that because of that the Mamkhulu is mistreating them.

The Aunt told the Social Worker that she loved these children and wanted to raise them along with her own and her husband. She said that Thuli could move back in with them that day!!! So, we left Thuli and Ntokozo with the Social Worker who agreed to do so.

We left Social Services feeling very well. Things like this hardly ever happen. But this story does have a happy ending. When we followed up with Thuli, she was attending a new school where we also have a KIDS CLUB running and she was very pleased with the new school uniform that C4L had bought for her. She was very happy living with the aunt and her family.

It’s nice when something like this happens – only wish it happened more often.

I have been so busy since I came back to South Africa.  Other than the fact that I am poor and don't have a car, my life as a Peace Corps volunteer feels pretty normal.  I go to work everyday, come home tired at night and try to catch up with errands, chores on the weekends.  Today I am going to the SPCA to pick up a kitten that I adopted recently.  He got fixed.  I am so excited as I have missed so much having a pet.  I will bring him back to the states with me when I come home.

  The last of the original group of volunteers that I came over here with will be leaving tomorrow.  It is a little sad to see them go; hard to believe that 26 months has passed.  I am one of 5 who are extending our service into a third year although I said I would finish in June, 2009 to coordinate this with my house becoming available to move back into.  One of my good friends, Brenda, also extended and I am very happy about that.  I have also made some new friends from the most recent group who came here the end of January, 2008.

  I started a garden outside my cottage and it is going great.  I have had great lettace for more than 2 months as well as herbs and leeks.  Recently I put in some green beans, will be adding more today, and some tomato volunteers have come up from last season and are doing nicely.  I had planted some gladiolla bulbs last spring and they have come up again too.

   I am pretty much acting as a Trainer and Mentor these days.  The 37 youth who are taking the Community Development Practice course (the one I came back here to finish with them) went through their first of 5 "workplace assessments" this week - and they knocked the Assessor's socks off!  He told them/us that our group is the very best group of learners they have ever had!!  He was very impressed with their confidence, their presentation skills, and their ability to engage and work with orphans & vulnerable children in their schools.  Right now I feel like a proud mother!!

   I have also been doing some training with adults.  I co-taught a week-long workshop for Caregivers in another part of South Africa with my supervisor, Heather which went very well.  We were so close to the Lesotho border that we decided to go there and spend a couple of days seeing the country and shopping (of course).  Lesotho is still very much third world and it was interesting to see.  Much of life there is pastoral and we saw many farms and herds of cattle, sheep and goats.  Very little infrastructure away from the capital of Maseru and even that city is just beginning to develop.  We also visited a number of weavers and came back with some woolen tapestries that they are famous for making.

   This week the Senior Management Team from the Water Aid Mozambique program are here for a team-building workshop.  I wrote a manual and prepared 4 of our youth leaders to facilitate and debrief them as they work there way through our obstacle course as one of their team activities.  It went well, gave the kids more confidence, and they got to earn a little money too.  They were a bit intimidated at first because they usually do the course with the children who come to our psycho-social support camps.  Other than having the team drop one of its members during an exercise on day 2, things have gone well and I can see what a boost it has been to their self-esteem to be successful this week.

   Heather and I will be doing a week-long set of  2-hour team-building sessions next month for an organization called PenReach.  Heather started this NGO while she was working at Penryn College prior to 2003.  We did some similar work with them last year in Kruger Park; they are an easy group to work with as they are all educators.

   In early November I am taking a vacation with 3 other PC volunteers and we are spending a week in St. Lucia, a very beautiful part of Kwa-Zulu-Natal province.  It is a bird, marine, and wildlife sanctuary on the Indian Ocean.  I was able to get a 3-bedroom, 3-bath cottage at a resort there with my timeshare exchange.  I am already very ready to go.  When my friend Kevin was here last October, we spent a day there but this time we will really get to see and do much more.  I still haven't made it to Mozambique or Namibia but they are on the list to see before the next year is out.

   I do intend to go back over these last few months and share some of my stories with you, so stay tuned . . .

For many reasons, it is very important that Peace Corps Volunteers do not come to another country and “live like rich Americans” even though this is how we are always perceived at first. The ways things work is that the NGO that we are assigned to is responsible for providing us with housing and Peace Corps gives a modest monthly living allowance which gives us plenty of practice in paying cash for everything and being frugal.

I didn’t realize how much my internal dialogue about money had changed until I recently returned from my rehab period in the States. Let me take you through some of it:

First let me set the scene. In the morning, I am going to travel by public taxi to Graskop (actually, I have to use 3 different taxis) to spend the weekend with 4 other Peace Corps Volunteers who live within striking distance. Now, a trip like this in not within my monthly budget. Peace Corps gives each of us a vacation allowance equivalent to $24.00 each month that we serve. I try not to spend mine but rather save them up for longer trips I might be planning. A visit like this means I have to tighten my belt a bit.

Tuesday I needed to go into town to do an errand. I planned to leave from work and take a taxi in. In trying to decide what time to do this, I hemmed and hawed about whether I would stop at my favorite coffee shop “Mama’s” for lunch or coffee. I know that the cheapest thing on their menu is a toasted cheese and tomato sandwich for R16 and that if I just drink ice water and lemon I can get away pretty cheap (around $2.25).

But since a pot of their Bodum Coffee is only R10,50 I decided to make my lunch, bring it to work and eat it first before going into town. But you know what they say about the best made plans. Turns out that my NGO’s CEO wanted to meet with me and offered to treat me to lunch in town. He also took me where I needed to go to get my errand done. He also drove. It meant I needed to pass on the coffee but, hey, I didn’t have to spend any money that day! This is a success.

Wednesday was the Day of the African Child event and I had forgotten that these events also include lunch. Since the government buildings are close to the nearest Mall for me in Nelspruit, I decided to stop at the mall before coming home. So I made myself a chicken sandwich, grabbed an apple and headed to the highway to hail a taxi. It cost me R10 for the taxi to the mall. After the event, Nqoba, a youth leader I mentor agreed to drop me off at the mall on his way back to work.

One of my favorite places at the Mall (much like any mall in the U.S.) is “Mugg & Bean”, South Africa’s equivalent to Starbucks with a much bigger menu. Their mug of “bottomless” coffee had gone up to R10,90 since I left but since I was feeling a bit frustrated by not treating myself to a coffee the previous day, I decided to indulge myself. Besides, I had forgotten that I was getting lunch at the event and my chicken sandwich and apple would be going home with me! With tip, the 2 mugs of coffee cost me R12.

After I did my necessary grocery shopping (where I have to think hard before buying anything that is not true food) I walked up to the highway to hail a taxi back home. This meant spending another R10. But this day I got lucky. A neighbor of mine happened by and when she saw me standing on the side of the road with my “stuff,” she stopped and offered me a ride. So the way I see it, the money I saved on a one-way taxi fare brought the cost of that mug of coffee to R2!! Such a deal!

Can you see yourself doing this everytime you take out your wallet? This is going to do me so much good someday you say. . . . . RIGHT J )) . . . . .

On June 4^th I attended the African Day of the Child event held at the government’s legislative buildings here in Nelspruit, Mpumalanga province, with 16 members of our youth team.

I hope I have these facts right: in 1978 in or near Soweto a large student body uprose to protest the teaching of mathematics to black children in the Afrikaans language. Sadly, it turned into a very violent day and many children were killed. The African Day of the Child was named in 2004 as a day to remember and commemorate those children.

A legislative session was held and conducted by selected children from the various schools in the province. Also in attendance were members of the legislature itself, government officials, educators, childcare workers, etc., and other interested parties. I think at least half of the children who participated (about 200) were disabled.

“Madam Chairman” was a wonderful little girl, and I do mean little: from where I was sitting, I could only see the top of her head and forehead. If she looked up occasionally I got a glimpse of her eyes but that was it. She followed that standard protocol that is followed by the legislature when it meets in the same meeting venue.

Several children were given an opportunity to speak and express their concerns to the seated adults about the state of childcare in the largest sense and how it affects them and their communities. Since there was a large group of deaf children in attendance, there were 2 or 3 people who “signed” for them. Children in wheelchairs were accommodated for and a child with a pretty severe case of polio got himself up to the podium while we all held our breath – quite touching.

I was so impressed with the depth and range of issues that these children brought up: from clean water, proper sanitation/hygiene needs, all forms of abuse, lack of infrastructure in their communities, safety in their schools, lack of housing, escalating crime/violence, not having enough to eat, up to and including the xenophobia that has been happening here in South Africa of late.

There were a few funny, amazing moments for me, one was watching a older deaf child signing her concerns with great rapidity of movement while at the same time another child was furiously translating in siSwati what she was talking about! I couldn’t believe how fast this was happennng J ))

After that, legislative members present and several other people from within the government responded. Repeatedly, they told the children that this meeting was “not a talk show” and that their issues and concerns were being taken very seriously and acted upon quickly. I seriously hope that they stick to that commitment given the great needs I have seen during my time here in South Africa.

Next there was a vote of thanks given to all of the sponsors and volunteers that made the event possible and then Madam Chairman led the parade of people in attendance out onto the outer courtyard for the “entertainment” portion of the day that proceeded lunch. I had forgotten – food is always provided at these events and I remember wondering as I watched these children for how many of them this would be the only meal that they got that day.

Over the next 90 minutes, several groups of children took turns doing “performances.” The youth leaders I came with performed a combination of drama, singing and dancing entitled “SAY NO TO DRUGS, SAY YES TO LOVE. Feeling like a proud mama, I applauded them profusely when there were finished. All of the groups were good, these children have such natural voices and rhythm. But two deserve particular mention.

The first was a group of 5 adolescent girls who did a dance number to music that they could not hear! This was amazing to watch and they were totally on the beat. It just amazed me that they could dance this way by using their other senses to do so. Oh, and remember that child with polio I mentioned earlier? He was so moved that he spontaneously got up on stage and joined them (a common occurrence here) and he kept perfect beat to the music too!!

The second was also a group of girls who looked to be between 8 and 16 years of age. They performed some traditional Swazi dances for us but it was their attire or lack thereof that shocked me. They were all naked except for a traditional Swazi (read skimpy here) skirt which was attached to a narrow strap crossed over one of their shoulders.

When they first came out, I was taken aback: they were all bare-chested and some were quite well developed. Once they started their first number, I turn to Space, one of the youth leaders I was with, and said to him that “in my culture” I wouldn’t be seeing something like this in public. He told me that this was the first time he had ever seen this in person also; once or twice on television, but never live before. Many of the other youth leaders were snickering too – I surmised that this was a first for them as well.

One of the traditional siSwati dance moves is a high one-legged kick. These girls did not face the audience while they were doing these (although this is the true form) thank God but it took me a few moments to realize that they were not wearing underwear either. Not quick believing what I was seeing, I again turned to Space and asked him “Are these girls wearing underpants?” More giggles . . No! he replied. Now I ask you? Am I just getting old or what? So I think I will respectfully chalk this one up to “cultural differences” and let it go at that.

It was quite a day.